Swinging [From The] Bachelor Pad (Rafters)

or
toss me in the microwave,
i'm still good!

Last night, while cooking, I passed gas and didn't have to worry about ruining anyone's appetite but my own. This morning, while desecrating the bathroom, I left the door open and didn't run the tap to drown out the noise. I'm not wearing any pants right now.

Library Girl moved out yesterday (for the second time!) and I'm finding old habits returning faster than ever before. While I'll admit that most of the common benefits of residing in a bachelor pad are lost on me (intercourse with random females, a place to put my weights, Scarface posters), others I'm looking forward to taking full advantage of (re-watching Krystof Kieslowski's 10-hour Dekalog series without worrying about missing Gilmore Girls, turning a blind eye once again to my potential drinking problem, eating as many cookies as I want without the need to save one).